We have all met them – male and female – at some stage in a social situation. They will be the one at the party who you can’t help but notice – not because they have a cool haircut, a great derriere or just that…. je ne sais quoi!
No, sadly the reason you have to notice them is because they are right there – in your face. They demand the attention of everyone in the room from the minute they walk in talking loudly (about themselves), they are not interested in anything you might have to say, they are completely oblivious about social etiquette and don’t even have the slightest awareness of the art of conversation or that this involves listening as well as talking.
After ramming their views down your throat in a bullish forceful manner, they move on to the next victim leaving you exhausted and drained after only a few minutes in their company…
These social bores sure make an impression on us – but for all the wrong reasons.
These are the people we talk about the day after the party “OMG, did you see that guy at the party last night – all he did was brag about himself the whole night, not only was he completely boorish and vulgar – but he wasn’t smart, witty or interesting by any stretch of the imagination.
And so it is with Social Media Bores…
If you use social media on sites like Twitter and Facebook you surely would have encountered the same rudeness with “friends” or “followers” who constantly hurl themselves at you, pitching their business like a fanatical zealot – a behaviour you would reserve for your worst enemy, not your “friend” or “follower”.
Why do people use social media for businesses this way?
Don’t they get it?
Can’t they see that this behaviour is the same, irrespective of whether you are online or offline? Either way it’s a social connection you are making. You know how it works – the best form of advertising is word of mouth – for better or worse.
Think of it this way, you wouldn’t meet someone at a party and immediately thrust your business card into their hand demanding they see your products or services – would you? Of course not.
You would engage them in conversation, ask them about themselves, seek out similar interests, show respect, talk about mutual interests or topical events and engage in the art of conversation, maybe even exchange phone numbers if you really get on well and would like to see them again.
But, never, never, never, would you force your business or products on them.
It reeks of the Amway of old when you were invited to a friend’s house for the evening on the premise they had something to show you. Didn’t you just hate it when at the end of the evening you were introduced to Amway?
Why? Because you had been tricked – and by your friend!
Trying to trick people or get your message through by deception is the worse way you could ever hope to gain someone’s friendship or interest, let alone their business.
And this is the big one…
People do business with people they like…
… memorize these words as they will be extremely valuable in your day to day dealings with potential clients, customers or collaborators for your business and you will go a long way towards creating sustainable, enduring business relationships.
Do yourself a big favour and think about this next time you are tweeting or posting.
When you are using social media for businesses you must give value and build relationships if you wish to be successful with your social media efforts.
Remember what conversation is : A pleasant informal interchange of thoughts between people.
Midge Hand is a Co-founder and Director of High Profile Enterprises. Midge is one of only around 50 Copyblogger Media Certified Content Marketers and is the only one in New Zealand. When away from the demands of running High Profile Enterprises, Midge enjoys time with family, cooking for friends, Pilates and paddle boarding. This year her new challenge is to learn to play the melodica.